There are many times people ask “why do people cheat?” Many
scandals in politics or detailed antics with sports stars or actors leave many
of us to wonder why people in affluent positions, with gorgeous spouses and in
the public eye still go out of their way to carry on a one-night stand, or a
more long term relationship with anyone else. If the person they have an
affair with is less attractive than the spouse they have, that increases our astonishment.
There have been different types of research done to try to get a better
understanding of why people cheat. Women are said to more likely be in need of
emotional attention- men, physical. Biology has been a reason, “men want to spread
their seed”. There have been different approaches to try to find the answer,
such as evolutionary approaches or new directions our society may be taking,
but still it’s difficult to determine the real answer.
Something I found interesting was in the past more men have
been prone to cheating than women, but now, it’s about the same, close to 25% admitting to it.
Attributes to this have been the greater likelihood of women to admit they have
cheated now, than in the past, where criticism would have been much harsher.
Other ideas include the gaining of different freedoms. Women have gained more power
and independence. Now, many women work outside the home, therefore are in contact
with more men. As we gain equal status, and similar numbers of us are cheating,
what does that actually say? Women want to cheat just as much as men, but weren’t
able to before? What causes us to want to stray from relationships? Does it
have to do with our partners or ourselves?
However, another question to ask may be what keeps people together? With infidelity becoming more normal and divorce rates remaining steady about about 50%, what makes people either not cheat, or stay together after the fact? For many, many years people have come together in marriage. In some cases it was to earn families more power, or for financial gains. When did it become about love? Why after this much time has passed do we believe there is only one person for us? It seems silly. We grow and develop over time and it's crazy to imagine we will find someone that will grow at the same rate, pace, and direction of ourselves. Perhaps if we stopped trying to live up to the idea that one person can fulfill us, we wouldn't have to worry about people cheating at all.
